Saturday 10 September 2016

PANIC ATTACKS, ANXIETY & ME

Oh Hey...


Before I start this blog post thought I'd let you know it is going to be a personal post, something a bit different...


Lets start with a silly selfie smile, because everything isn't always bad! :)

I've seen bits about mental health floating about on social media over the last couple of weeks and thought I'd share a little about mine. Alot of people don't know but I have been suffering with panic attacks and anxiety since I was around 17/18 so thats 6 years now and I've had my fair share of ups and downs with it. 
I'm very aware that not everyone understands what anxiety/panic attacks are or how they can affect your day-to-day life, even after you've explained yourself many many times but unless you've been through it can be hard to grasp.

I remember my first panic attack like it was yesterday, all of sudden, out the blue, I was struggling to breathe , I was sweating, my head was cloudy and all I could think was 'I'm going to collapse (i was lieing on my kitchen floor) I was shaking, my legs seized up, it was awful - but also not very pleasant for those who witnessed it. I did end up in hospital - something to certainly laugh about now! but no-one knew what was going on at the time. 

What are the symptoms of a panic attack?
A panic attack can come on with no sign, warning or no obvious triggers, however it is usually a build up on heightened anxiety. A sudden release of adrenaline causes the rise/change in heart rate and alot of the characteristics both physically and mentally.
Just a few include;
- change in breathing rate - more rapid
- pains in your body
- sweating/shivering
- dizziness
- feeling claustrophobic
- nausea
- shaking
- tightening muscles
- overly emotional
- sense of feeling trapped

Usually panic attacks last between 5-20 minutes, if any longer it is usually attack after attack until you are able to find a 'safe' spot where you can be comfortable and gain some sort of control.

I am very LUCKY to know what triggered my first ever panic attack. Its down to health situation not of my own, that I can't divulge into. These days, many different things affect me and can trigger it-my emotions and how I'm feeling play a massive part. So as an example: if I'm overly distressed about something or run down, I will tend to have panic attacks :(

However, this does not mean I can control them. For the particular situation that caused my first-means that this memory will stay with me and my mind has learned to react this way in similar situations; even just talking about it at a First Aid course can set me off.
After my first panic attack I began having frequent attacks, I could have been anywhere, work seemed to be the main place - which was embarrassing. One minute I'd be talking to someone, mid-sentence I'd began struggling to breathe, getting hot and have to walk off. I felt so rude. I did when I recovered, apologise to said person.

This then caused me to have anxiety about going out and doing things as nearly every time I did leave the house it'd happen. I also worried alot about going to sleep as having panic attacks in my sleep was waking me alot of the time, so began sleeping on the sofa alot and with lights on. I'l let you in on a secret, I still to this day have to sleep with a light on- its a comfort for IF I am woken up by a panic attack.

Edit Feb 2017 - this has improved its not a big landing light anymore, now dim fairy lights on my bed.

I felt uneasy and worried about leaving my house. I was nervous soul. It reached a point where I stopped going out especially if it meant going out on my own or in a group of friends, I still find myself turning things down these days but not so much. I suffered terribly with a 'cloudy head' a hungover-like feeling for such a long time caused by my panic attacks, I would go to sleep and wake up with it.


YOUR GONNA THINK I'M CRAZY FOR SAYING THIS!!
Magically, when I found out I was pregnant apart from the groggy pregnancy feelings all my anxiety and panic attacks just stopped - no more 'cloudy head'. I think it helped with having something else to focus on. I did feel so much better and at ease with myself. This well feeling continued after I'd had my son which is such a bonus. Don't get me wrong I've had a couple of mini panic attacks but not as near frequently as they used to be. Only recently I've suffered alittle more.

What can I do in a panic attack?
Recently, someone who has penalised me for having panic attacks and anxiety sent me a video on changing a panic attack into a feeling of excitement instead of fear and that having a panic attack will NOT harm you.
There is not anything I can do to ease the anxiety but to avoid the situations that causes it, as if my mental health is affected then this also affects my son too- thats my main focus.

Over the years, I've picked up and been advised on a couple of tips and tricks to ease a panic attack. 
- Focus on something in the far distance and slowly count to 5 or 10
- Deep slow breaths
- Distract yourself - I get up and play with my son
- Get up, walk it off, take in the finer details of a walk - the colour of the leaves.
- Write down how you feel
- Try not to overwork yourself 
- Find a comfort zone- a piece of music, TV funny series or book.
- Be organised - this helps me alot!
- my number one is - DO NOT feel bad or silly or stupid or any negative feelings about this.

We all have our own ways of dealing with a panic attack and it doesn't matter what it is as long as it helps :)

How can I help in a panic attack?
- Be patient and reassuring,
- Let them take everything at there own pace
- Don't leave them alone, but don't be too 'in your face'
- Don't rush or force the person to do anything
- Don't show disappointment, anger it'll only make them feel worse
- Don't judge!
- Let them know your there, before, during and after.


Not everyone will understand what its like to have a panic attack or have anxiety about things but remember you are NOT alone. Remember that your mental health is important, you shouldn't have to change or force yourself to to do something your not comfortable with just to make that other person happy. You are important too!

Well thats abit of my story, rather chatty isn't it? haha


 I really really hope this has helped someone in some way and I have covered most things.
Please leave comments of your experiences below or any tips or tricks you have, not only will it help me, but lots of us.
❤❤



Saturday 3 September 2016

AUTUMN JUMPERS WISHLIST - MOTHER&SON

With the drastic change in weather the last few days and sitting here feeling the cold, listening to the rain; blankets are out, heating is on and the snuffly noses have returned. I've found myself wandering around online looking at Jumpers/Jackets and just general warmer wear. 
To be honest, I reckon it'll be blazing hot sunshine again soon...but hey, better to be prepared, right? It is English weather after all, the most unpredictable!

So whilst having a little gander online I thought I'd put together a little wishlist of jumpers/jackets I'd like me and my son to have this year :)



Multicoloured Checked Coat - River Island
I am so in love with RI at the moment, I'd buy the whole shop if I could. I came across this Coat I believe in a window display in my local store, and fell in love immediately! I like how it has drops of colour to brighten it up from just being that average 'black coat'  - I think it would go with majority of my wardrobe and can be dressed up or down - perfect for most occasions. 

Flecked Knit Jumper - New Look
Pretty simple colours, be perfect with a pair of jeans
Michelle Keegan Fur Collar Batwing Jumper - Lipsy
Something a little out my comfort zone, something I wouldn't usually wear but the fur just makes it look so cosy and warm. It is detachable, so can also whip it off if its getting in the way or whatnot.

I've seen a couple of other knitwear items on Boohoo and Asos that I'm also after and also going to have a gander in our newly refurbished Primark and see what I can come across
..but I'm not too sure how many jumpers is too many? haha


All Items - Next

Alex is a little hit and miss in most shops with sizes but I 100% know the size of Next clothes for him so this is my usual go-to place if I'm looking to order online as is garenteed to fit. Don't get me wrong if I'm out and about and see something I/he likes in the local supermarket (Asda clothes are my fave atm) or clothes shop I will pick it up and give it try on him :)
I think a nice little gilet will be perfect for those not too cold, not too hot days to wear with a long-sleeved top and jeans.
I love the chevron jumper, I have no idea but really reminds me of the build up to Christmas nice simple colours too. Just a little cute piece I think he'd look quite cute in.
I have repurchased this hoodie many times every time he grows out of one, its just such a staple product in his wardrobe, it goes with everything, a nice little layer if its a little chilly, perfect for him to get on and off when the weather changes.


I'm quite looking forward to updating our wardrobes, whats on your wishlists this year?
I'd love to know 
xx